10 Funny Teacher Puns Per Subjcet (History, English, Math, Science)

As a teacher, you have a room full of children that double as your stand up comedy crowd. Luckily they understand your corn puns worthy of a dad joke trophy. If you need a little inspiration for some funny puns for teachers, here you go:

English Teacher Puns

1. English teachers get lit
2. Reading is lit
3. Let's eat Grandma.  Let's eat, Grandma.  Comma's save lives.
4. English teachers are always write!
5. The past, the present, and the future walked into a bar. It was tense.
6. When I was a kid, my English teacher looked my way and said, "Name two pronouns." I said, "Who, me?"
7. Why are apostrophes terrible to date?  Because they are possessive
8. Which dinosaur knows a lot of synonyms?  A thesaurus
9. 7 days without a pun makes one weak
10. Metaphors be with you

== Puns on English teacher shirts ==

Science Teacher Puns

1. I make horrible science puns, but only periodically
2. Think like a proton and stay positive
3. I love the way the earth rotates.  It really makes my day
4. I don't think you understand the gravity of this science lesson
5. Once I told a chemistry joke. There was no reaction.
6. When I heard oxygen and magnesium were dating, I was like O MG
7. You matter!  Unless you multiply yourself by the speed of light...then you energy.
8. My head hertz from the frequency of these puns
9. That was sodium funny. I slapped my neon that one.
10. I'm out of chemistry jokes, but I should zinc of a new one

== Puns on Science teacher shirts ==

Math Teacher Puns

1. Why is the obtuse triangle upset? Because it's never right
2. Not all math puns are horrible. Only sum
3. y=mx+b is my favorite one-liner
4. Think outside the quadrilateral
5. Too much pi gives you a large circumference
6. Oh you have graph paper?  You must be plotting something
7. My math teacher called me average.  That was mean.
8. You have to be odd to be number 1
9. Math teachers have problems
10. You know what seems odd to me? Numbers that aren't divisible by 2

== Puns on Science teacher shirts ==

History Teacher Puns

1. Do you think ancient Mesopotamians went on Sumer vacation?
2. Who built King Arthur's Round Table? Sir Cumference
3. There's no time for Stalin when you're Russian to industrialize 
4. History.  History.  Did I just rewrite history?
5. Civil War jokes?  I General Lee don't find them funny
6. History teachers live in the past
7. If anyone Khan, Genghis Kahn
8. I read the constitution for the articles
9. As a history teacher I like to Babylon
10. What kind of music did the Pilgrims like?  Plymouth Rock

== Puns on History teacher shirts ==

Leave a comment with some of your own funny puns!